Where do we go from here...

Divorce is all about milestones , you can't rush any of them because each serve a purpose and require there own amount of time. You are learning who you are again, and I definitely think you will like the person you find. There are certain things you can take comfort in knowing: your children are more resilient than you think, you are more attractive to others than you are yourself, and the pain you feel now, you will not be able to recall six months from now you simply just remember "it hurt". This weekend at some point do something you didn't feel free to do while married whether it be leave the cap off the toothpaste or some sort of decoration to the house, it will liberate you. Last thing remember you aren't discovering a new country or blazing a new trail there are millions of footprints your following in don't hesitate to seek guidance in someone further up the path. ...... and pray

It is something that many people deal with these days but I doubt very seriously that anyone has dealt with it the way I have. In a matter of 3 weeks my husband and I separated and filed for divorce. Our entire life divided on a legal pad. From Savings Bonds to visitation schedules… we planned the rest of the lives of our children. Agreeing on everything from who gets the couch to the sacred pot for boiling tea.

I’m not sure where I am right now. I’m in a world I don’t know. It’s a bad dream. My friend described his divorce to me in a way that scared me to death. It’s like major surgery. Right now I’m lying there, about to go under anesthesia. I’m numb because I’ve got enough drugs in me that I just don’t care anymore. And when I wake up, when its all over… its going to hurt. Hurt like hell. I don’t want to wake up. I don’t want to be cut open. I don’t want to lose that part of my soul… but I am. Will I survive? God only knows the answer to that. I’m not sure what the survival rate is on Divorce. I know that most people live through it, move on, and are eventually happy again. But I’m not most people.

Someone shake me, wake me up! This can’t be happening to me.

I filed for the divorce, I called his bluff when he said he wanted one, but I came back begging and pleading to not let this happen. Can’t we just take time apart? Lets separate and see how things are. Let’s see if we want to live out our lives alone. No was the answer. This is the best thing. I never thought that it would come to this so fast. I always felt that if we were to split up it would take years, a battle over the kids and the contents of our lives. I think what hurts me the most is that it was all there… on three sheets of a yellow legal pad. My life… his life… the children…. all right there. I can’t explain the feeling any way other than what I have already

Most people are surprised when they find out what is happening. They seem to think that we are or were the perfect couple. We weren’t, never were, and never will be. That’s reality for you. We fought like most people, but we also broke trust. That is one thing that is never truly regained. No matter how hard you fight, trust can’t be earned back. It will always be in the back of you mind, lingering, burning a hole. And no matter how hard you try that wound will never heal. I truly love this man, I have for eight years, our anniversary was November 22nd. Both of us tried to treat it as a day like any other but in the end I was left in my own tears alone. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't listen to music any longer... any song with love in it makes me cry. Even Elvis's Blue Christmas makes me tear up. I've turned off my radio in the car. I've taken off my wedding ring. I haven't even taken the time to try and read. The only reason I blogged is because a dear friend said maybe it would help me to cleanse my soul. Here I am.. trying.

So I’m asking you, to keep me in your thought. Keep my children in my prayers. Expect the worst, hope for the best. Pray that we will make it through this with only minor injury and that he and I will be able to be friends again.

I love you all. See you soon.

The Wednesday Funnies

Baked Beans...

Once upon a time there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, he adored them, he yearned for them. But they always caused him a great deal of embarrassment shortly after eating them. The reaction of his body to the beans was swift and terrible to behold.
 
One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he realized she might be even more embarrassed and humiliated by his addiction to baked beans. He decided to make the supreme sacrifice and give up his beloved baked beans. A short time later they were married.
 
Some months later, on his way home from work, his car broke down. He was not too far from home so he decided to leave the car and walk the rest of the way. He passed a small roadside cafe and decided to call his wife and tell her that he would be late for supper. As he entered the cafe, the smell of baked beans overwhelmed him. He still had several miles to go, and decided that he could walk off any after-effects before reaching home. Before he knew it, he had eaten three large plates of baked beans. Even as he left the cafe, the effects began to be felt. He pooted up a hill, and poot-pooted down the other side. As he grew closer to home, the frequency and forcefulness diminished greatly, and he felt reasonably safe.
 
Just as he reached his home, however, he felt a great rumbling inside and was seized with a terrible urgency. As he waited just outside his front door to release one last effort, his wife threw open the door. She excitedly exclaimed, "Darling, I have made the most wonderful surprise dinner for you." She blindfolded him and led him to his chair at the head of the table. Just as she was ready to remove the blindfold, the phone rang. She made him promise not to peek until she returned and went to answer the phone.
 
When she had gone, he seized the opportunity, shifted his weight to one leg and loudly broke wind. It was not only loud, but as ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he took his napkin and began to fan the air about him. He just started feeling better when he felt another urge. He again raised one leg and let her rip. It sounded like a tuba and smelled so bad that he started gagging. He fanned until his arms ached. Things had just about returned to normal when he felt another powerful urge. He shifted his weight to the other leg and let go. This was the prize-winner. The windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook and a minute later the flowers on the table were dead.
 
While keeping one ear on the conversation in the hallway, he continued like this for the next 15 or 20 minutes, fanning away each time with his napkin. When the sounds of farewells indicated the end of the telephone conversation, he neatly laid his napkin in his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife returned to the room.

Apologizing for talking so long, she asked if he had peeked. After assuring her that he had not, she removed the blindfold, revealing the dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party!

A Spiritual Gift

Have you ever wondered what you were meant to do? No I don’t mean, what you want to be when you grow up, I mean… what is your special gift. What are you supposed to do with your life spiritually. What does God want you to do?

I recently went online to a website to see what my Spiritual Gift is. I don’t remember the website, but you can look online at places like ChristiaNet.com or MinTools.com and find a quiz that is quite similar.

I had always thought that my gift was singing… I’ve said it before that I love to sing, and I would love to start singing in the church again. One of the spiritual gifts that we are given is music, but not me. I found that after taking the quiz that my gift is Mercy.

Mercy: Romans 12:8 - to be sensitive toward those who are suffering, whether physically, mentally, or emotionally, so as to feel genuine sympathy with their misery, speaking words of compassion but more so caring for them with deeds of love to help alleviate their distress.
Mercy? Really? Me? I didn’t believe it either, but after talking to my husband we figured out that I am a much happier person when I have done something selfless... when I have taken the time to help someone. I love to see people smile. I love doing things for others that make them feel good and that makes me feel good about myself. It is such a reward. With that in mind though, I have to remind myself daily that my actions towards others may completely change their whole day. If I don’t give that smile or lend a hand, how is that person going to feel for the rest of the day? I honestly hate for people to be unhappy, I really try too hard sometimes to mend broken situations. I don’t know if that is a strength or weakness.

My quote today on FaceBook is: “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.” ~ Mother Teresa.

I put that quote up today and was inspired to write this post. I challenge you to go to one of the sites and find out what your spiritual gift is. You may be surprised. Then, put your gift into action.

"There are different kinds of gifts but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord.” 1 Corinthians 12:4-5

“Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.” 1 Peter 4:10

“Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.” Romans 12:4-6a

The Wednesday Funnies

taken from tastefully offensive.com I now present to you .......

The Shakespeare Insult Kit

love letters

I started a new "project" this week. I'm not really good at showing my emotions, I'm scared that people will take advantage of the fact that I can be too nice at times. Usually when I get walked on is when I backlash, and it isn't a pretty sight.

The new project is "Love Letters". Most people keep a journal to write down their thoughts, and you might remember from the movie "The Help" where she wrote down her prayers. I took those two ideas and started writing a book of letters to my husband.

We have been going through a tough time lately, most couples do at some point in time in their marriage. I thought something like this would only help to make us stronger.

Two weeks ago I found myself standing in the self help isle at Lifeway Christian store looking for something to help me mend the problems in my life and my marriage. I ended up buying three books about love and respect, ordered one online called "The Peacemaker" and my neighbor brought me a book about the lies women tell themselves and believe... all in the same day. I thought at that moment, that day, God was talking to me. While I was in Lifeway I was drawn to where the journals are... I picked up the first one and on the front it said Love. That's when it hit me. I'm not that great at telling him how I feel or even showing him how I care about him, so with that in mind I bought the journal with the idea that I would start to write down all the things that I feel about us, our family, and our marriage.

This past Saturday while he was gone and while the kids were napping I sat down in my favorite chair, with my favorite pen and drew a complete blank. What happened next was something completely amazing. I decided to write a love letter to my husband. I explained to him how much I cared and what I wanted out of our relationship. I told him that no matter what we have been through we have always been able to climb back up that hill together and we would do it again this time. After writing my letter it was like I had started to fall in love all over again... I couldn't wait for him to read it. I was mad at frustrated with him when we got back home that afternoon. I took the kids to play when he walked in so he could have some peace and quiet. (he's not a happy camper when he gets sleepy and he had been up since 5:30 a.m.) I needed some time for peace and quiet as well, but that wasn't an option for me. But when I sat down with him later that day and showed him what I had done, all of the frustration and resentment left. As I saw the smile on his face I began to smile. It made me happy to make him happy.

I told him that now and then when I felt the need to be angry or loving, he might find a letter in that book. I've put it in a place in our bedroom where he could find it and maybe if he feels up to it, he could share his thoughts with me as well. I plan to start a book of letters for #1 and #2 that I can give to them when they get old enough to understand what I'm writing. Hope you do the same for your loved one

Twitterpated

Yes I am, I have become twitterpated.

If you look over to the left, down towards the bottom you will now see that I have added my tweet feed to my blog. This should be very helpful for the stalkers and haters to keep up with everthing that is going on in Rosie's life.

Something I added today, thought it would be fun. Happy Wednesday

My Wordless Wednesday...

The Wednesday Funnies

Just for a giggle I wanted to see what the month of October had to offer in the way of holidays and observances other than Halloween. It’s quite a long list but I hope you enjoy. I took this from Holidays for Everyday, enjoy!

Monthly Events:

Family History Month
National Pizza Month
National Clock Month
National Popcorn Popping Month
National Roller Skating Month
Adopt a Dog Month
Computer Learning Month
National Apple Month
National Car Care Month
National Pretzel Month
National Stamp Collecting Month
National AIDS Awareness Month
National Adopt a shelter pet Month
National Dessert Month
National Cosmetology Month
National Pickled Pepper Month
National Sarcastic Month
National Seafood Month
National Kitchen and Bath Month,
Vegetarian Awareness Month
Breast Cancer Awareness Month
Polish History Month
Child Health Month
National Pasta Month
Nation Pork Month
National Cookie Month
Health Literacy Month
Diversity Awareness Month
Domestic Violence Awareness Month
National Depression Education & Awareness Month
National Crime Prevention Month
National Disability Employment Awareness Month
Clergy Appreciation Month
Dinosaur Month
Eat Country Ham
Hunger Awareness Month
National Applejack Month
National Communicate with Your Kid Month
Fantasy Month
National Pharmacy Month
Do-It Yourself Month
National Dental Hygiene Month
National Orthodontic Month
Consumer Information Month
World Chocolate Awareness Month
American Magazine Month
Auto Battery Safety Month
Campaign for Healthier Babies Month
Christmas Seal Campaign MonthCountry Music Month
Energy Awareness Month
Car Care Month
Fire Prevention Month
Hunger Awareness Month
SIDS Awareness Month
Spinal Health Month
UNICEF Month
Youth against Tobacco Month
Asthma Awareness Month
Auto Battery Safety Month
Cookbook Month
Eat Better, Eat Together Month
Family Health Month
Healthy Lung Month
International Microwave Month
Learning Disabilities Awareness Month
Month of the First Frost
National Caramel Month
National Collector's Month
National Cranberry Month
National Education Month
National Pumpkin Month
National Sausage Month
Safe America Month
Sudden Infant Death Syndrome Awareness Month
Turn Over a New Leaf MonthChevy Truck Month
American Girl Month
Brain Awareness Month

Weekly Events:

Bank Teller Week- Week One
Teller Appreciation Week- Week One
National Customer Service Week- Week One
National Pickled Pepper Week- Week One
GOD Week (Get Organized Dammit!)- Week One
National Human Service Professional Awareness Week- Week One
National Newspaper Week- Week One
National Chili Week- Week Two
Shopping Cart Safety Awareness Week - Week Two
Fire Prevention Week - Week Two
Credit Union Week- Week Two Home Based Business Week- Week Two
National School Lunch Week- Week Two
Pet peeve Week - Week Two
Get Organized Week- Week Two
Squirrel Awareness Week- Week Two
Teen Read Week - Week Three
Kids Care Week- Week Three
National Veterinary Week- Week Three
National School Lunch Week- Week Three
National Adult Immunization Awareness Week- Week Three
Pharmacy Week- Week Three
Peace With Justice Week- Week Three
National Consumers Week- Week Three
Getting the World to Beat a Path to Your Door Week- Week Three
National Forest Products Week- Week Three
Wolf Awareness Week- Week Three
Business Women's Week- Week Three
World Rainforest Week- Week Four
Peace, Friendship, and Goodwill Week- Week Four
National School Bus Safety Week- Week Four

Daily Events:
1- Homemade cookie day
1- World Vegetarian Day
1- World Habitat Day
1- Earth Angel Day
1- Firepup's Birthday
1- Jimmy (James Earl) Carter's Birthday
1- Less Than Perfect Day
1- Model T Birthday
1- National Book It! Day
1- Walt Disney World Birthday 1971
1- World Series Birthday 1903
1- Special Delivery Birthday (1885, the post office began complete special delivery mail service in the United States.)
1- World Vegetarian Day
1- Postcard Birthday (1869, the first postcards were issued in Vienna, Austria.)
1- Yosemite National Park Birthday 18642- Name your car day
2- Charlie Brown's Birthday Peanuts comic strip first published In 1950.
2- World Farm Animal Day
2- Huckleberry Hound's Birthday 1958
2- Pixie and Dixie's Birthday 1958
2- Spanky's (George McFarland) Birthday 1928
2- National Custodial Workers Day
2- Tickle Me Elmo Launch Day 1997
2- Twilight Zone Birthday 1959
2- World Teacher's Day
2- Yogi Bear's Birthday 1958
2- Gandhi's Birthday3- Andy Griffith Show Birthday 1960
3- Virus Appreciation day
3- Captain Kangaroo Day (The show first aired on this day in 1955.)
3- Dick Van Dyke Show Premiere 1967
3- Child Health Day (first Monday in October)3- Family TV Show Day
3- Look at the Leaves Day
3- Mickey Mouse Club Birthday 1955
3- National Denim Day
3- Ozzie and Harriet Day 1952
3- World Smile Day4- Dick Tracy's Birthday 1931
4- First Space vehicle Launched 1957
4- Leave It to Beaver Birthday 1957
4- National Frugal Fun Day
4- Peppi the Peanut's Birthday
4- Rolie Polie Olie's Birthday 1998
4- Roy Rogers TV Show Premiere 1951
4- National Golf Day
4- Toot Your Flute Day5- Pablo Picasso's Birthday
5- National Techies Day
5- National Custodial Worker Day (first Wednesday in October)5- Ray Kroc's Birthday (Founder Of Mc Donald's Born 1902) 
5- National Story Telling Day
5- Ichabod and Mr. Toad Birthday 19496- German American Day
6- Come and take it day
6- Superman Marriage Anniversary 1996
6- Garlic Lovers Day
6- Physician Assistant Day
6- Lawyers Day7- Cats on Broadway Day 1982
7- G-Rated Birthday 1968
7- National Flower Day (1986, President Ronald Reagan signed the bill that made the rose the national flower of the United States.)
7- National Frappe Day8- American Tag Day (play tag)
8- National Children's Day
8- Bring Your Teddy Bear to Work Day
8- Tube Top Birthday 19759- National Sneakers Day
9- Piggly Wiggly Birthday 1917
9- The Count's Birthday (sesame street)
9- Yom Kippur
9- First two way telephone Conversation (1876)
9- Moldy Cheese Day 10- National Angel Food cake day
10- Columbus Day (Second Monday in October)10- National School Celebration
10- Tuxedo Birthday 188611- It's my party Day
11- Emergency Nurses Day
11- Eleanor Roosevelt's Birthday
11- World Egg Day12- International Moment Of Frustration Scream Day
12- Farmer's Day
12- National Children's Day
12- National School Celebration13- National Peanut Festival14- Thanksgiving Day in Canada
14- Grover's Birthday (sesame street)
14- National Dessert Day
14- Be Bald and Free Day
14- National Occupational Therapy Day
14- National FRUMP Day (Honors Frugal, Responsible, Unpretentious, Mature Persons)
14- national lower case day
14- National Take Comfort Day
14- Winnie-the-Pooh's Birthday 192615- Charlotte's Web Birthday 1952
15- I Love Lucy Day 1951
15- Mork & Mindy's Baby's Birthday 1981
15- Mushroom Day
15- Sweetest Day (third Saturday in October)15- National Grouch Day
15- National Poetry Day16- Dictionary Day
16- National Boss Day
16- World Food Day
16- National Dictionary Day (Noah Webster's Birthday)
16- National Sunday School Teacher Appreciation Day (third Sunday in October)16- Frosted Light Bulb Birthday 1928
16- Learn a Word Day
16- Let Them Eat Cake Day
16- School Librarian Day17- Cadillac Car Birthday 1902
17- Gaudy Day
17- International Adjust Your Chair Day (third Monday in October)17- National Geographic Birthday 1888
17- Hollywood Squares Day (1966 it premiered)17- La Leche League Birthday 1956
17- Gaudy Day18- No Beard Day
18- Black Poetry Day
18- Little Orphan Annie's Birthday (Comic strip 1922)
18- Oprah's Book Club Birthday 1996
18- Scary Black Cat Day
18- The Jungle Book Day (Movie 1967)
18- Puerto Rico Became U.S. Colony (1898)19- New Friends Day
19- Star Spangled Banner First Sung (1814)
19- Evaluate Your Life Day20- National Fruit Day
20- Monterey Bay Aquarium Birthday 1984
20- Suspenders Day21- Can-Can Birthday 1858
21- Electric Light Birthday 1879
21- Garbanzo Bean Day
21- Babbling Day22- Clean Up the Earth Day (6 months after Earth Day)
22- National Knee Day
22- Parachute Birthday
22- Used Car Dealership Birthday (London, England, in 1897)
22- National Nut Day 23- National Mole Day
23- Mother-In-Law's Day (Fourth Sunday in October)23- Canned Food Day
23- Dumbo's Birthday 1941
23- Soccer Player Day
23- Stay Up Late Day (Johnny Carson's Birthday)
24- Betty Lou's Birthday (sesame street)
24- United Nations Day
24- Nachos Birthday
24- 40-Hour Work Week Day (1940, the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938 went into effect.)
24- National Crazy Day
24- Black Thursday (1929, a major stock market panic occurred. Five days later, the stock market collapsed completely)
24- Take Me Out to the Ball Game Day 1908
24- Transcontinental Telegram Birthday 1861
24- Niagara Falls Barrel Day (1901, Annie Edson Taylor became the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel.)
24- First non-US team to win baseball's World Series (1992, the Toronto Blue Jays beat the Atlanta Braves)24- National Bologna Day25- National Denim Day
25- Pablo Picasso's Birthday (1881)
25- Carlsbad Caverns National Park Birthday 1923
25- Make a Difference Day
25- World Pizza maker's Day
25- George Washington Bridge Birthday 1931
25- Punk For A Day Day26- Gunfight at the OK Corral 1881
26- National Mule Day (The first mules in America arrived in Boston, Massachusetts, in 1785. They were a gift from King Charles III of Spain.)26- National Sleep-In Day27- Boxer Shorts Birthday 1901
27- Birthday of the Pencil 1492
27- Make a Difference Day
27- Cranky Co-Workers Day
27- Navy Day 1922
27- Turn Off the Violence Day
27- Teddy Roosevelt's Birthday28- National Chocolate Day
28- Plush Animal Lover's Day
28- Cotton Gin Birthday 1793
28- Criminal Fingerprints Day (First used in 1904)
28- Gulliver's Travels Birthday 1726
28- Ticker Tape Parade Birthday 1886
28- Statue of Liberty Birthday29- National Organization of Women Founded (1966)
29- Pepe the King Prawn Birthday 2001
29- Hermit Day
29- International Internet Day
29- Stock market Crash (1929) 30- National Candy Corn Day
30- Mischief Night31- National Magic Day
31- Increase Your Psychic Powers Day
31- Juliette Lowe's Birthday (Born in 1860. She started Girl Scouting in the US 1912.)
31- Halloween

Soft curls turned frizz... say it ain't so

What a fabulous weekend in Rosie's world.... yes it was. I finally came to the conclusion that I regret getting a perm.

Yep a perm... Alas I have had straight long chestnut locks for several years. Last week I needed to have a change. So, Sunday afternoon I got the need for something different and got a perm. Yes, I did. A perm.

What in the world was I thinking? I haven't quite figured out what to do about it yet. I've got a straightening iron, and heavy conditioner. I've read to use hot oil treatment and leave it on for hours to weigh it down, but I want it gone yesterday. So I tried my hand at using the iron yesterday and it seemed to work OK, this morning I washed my hair and tried again, and for some reason I have this wavy hump in the back that just won't go away. My hair, that used to be nice a silky smooth is now coarse and ... fluffy. I see many ponytails in my near future, even though I love the cut the girl did. Absolutely love it... now that I've seen it. Hahaha! OK, you can't laugh, I'm the only one that can do that.

I have had my issues with my hair. Several years ago I decided to go blond. Yeah, that was a big mistake. After sitting in the chair for with a new girl nearly 8 hours my hair was blond, or more like strawberry brassy blond. Two months later I decided I would be smart and do my own roots using a cap and a kit, therefore frying my hair that was half way down my back. The next day ponytail in tow I went back to my original hairdresser who with a look of disgust that I even did that to my hair, she had to chop of 8 inches and use a color filler in my hair. Back to brown we went. From that time on, I have done my own color. Highlights, fillers, coloring grey... all of if. To this day I will not let another person put color on my hair.

So why did I decide that I wanted to even perm the hair? I don't know. My husband likes curly hair. So I thought I would do something for him and have a hair style he liked? Maybe? Well, I got a regular perm, not a spiral and now it is just frizzy not pretty soft curls like I wanted. So now the trick it to figure out how to get it straight again without looking like I fried my hair.

Off to the CVS I will go with a shopping list from my friends of things to try. Maybe I will even go for the Brazilian Blowout. More money to correct something I should have never done in the first place, I haven't completely given up the idea of just cutting it all off and starting over. I'm a unique person with my own unique style, but I know I will seriously regret that idea when I start to look like Molly Ringwald in 16 Candles. Ugh.. that hairdo is way to 1985 for me to even try to get away with.

Wish me luck on my endeavor to get my straight hair back. Until then, no photos please.

to tweet or not to tweet...

Check it out... I have a twitter account.

So for all of you that may be interested in what I have to say on Twitter, I am hello_rosie. I have no clue how to do this thing or whatever so until I get it figured out just laugh along with me.

If you have a Twitter account, give me your user name below and I will follow you :)

The Wednesday Funnies

A Chinese guy goes to a Jew to buy black bras, size 38.
The Jew, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras

are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers.
Therefore he has to charge $50.00 each for them.

The Chinese guy reluctantly buys 25 bras.

He returns a few days later and this time orders fifty.

The Jew tells him that they have become even harder to get

and charges him $60.00 each.

The Chinese guy returns a month later and buys the Jew’s remaining

stock of 50, and this time for $75.00 each.

The Jew is somewhat puzzled by the large demand for black
size 38 bras and asks the Chinese guy, please tell me:

What do you do with all these black bras?

The Chinese guy answers:

‘I cut them in half and sell them as skull caps
to you Jews for $200.00 each.

Paranormal activity?

Haunted...

I was at S30P and the writing prompt for the week is Haunted. Being that it is that time of year I just couldn't pass this one up. I love a good ghost story or scary movie.

If you have read any of my post about my dreams you would surely think I was haunted. There are some creepy things that go on in that little head of mine... just kidding. But in all seriousness, I do have some strange and horrifying dreams sometimes. Over the last few weeks though they have seemed to stop but for the most part, when I have one, it's a pretty good one. I started blogging some of them, but I just don't know how to put them down on paper well enough to do them justice for other readers. My dreams are vivid, detailed, full of color and dement ion. So many things going on at one time. Most of them are in three parts, all of them are reoccurring at some point in time or another.

I often thought that from my dreams I was haunted. I will sit up in the middle of the night screaming. Some nights I can't even scream, not in my dreams or even to wake myself. I've been told they are called night terrors, but I don't sleep walk with them. Most of the time when I have one that is really bad, I will hum in my sleep. I know I've mentioned that to you before. It's a deep hum, almost a growl. Creeps out the husband when he hears it. He will usually wake me up when I start. Mom says I did it even as a child in my sleep. I had the nightmares then too.

The part that really bothers me is that my dreams are so realistic sometimes I can't tell if I'm awake or dreaming. I woke up several nights as a young child when we lived in Briarwood to a little red headed boy standing next to my bed holding a record player. When we lived in our house in Broadmoor I woke up to a man standing at the foot of my bed, I would be so petrified I couldn't reach out to turn on the lamp next to my bed. But was it just a dream, or was I awake? I haven't had these incidents since High School but the nightmares have gotten quite worse. I've been taking something to help me sleep and I think it is one of the reasons I don't remember my dreams as well.

I watched Paranormal Activity the other night and it made me curious... do I walk in my sleep, is there a certain time in my sleep pattern that I start the dreams, do I hum every night, can I actually scream out loud? I wonder this pretty often. No I don't think I'm deamon posessed or anything like that. I really wonder... what have I done or what is going on inside my head that I dream this way?

Karma, Karma, Karma....

KARMA..... such an evil little woman she is... Karma. We all wish for it on someone at some point in time. Some of the more tacky people enjoy it when their so called Karma takes a big hit on someone. Here are a few things to ponder when wishing Karma on another person or enjoying another person's "bad luck".

KARMA: often capitalized : the force generated by a person's actions held in Hinduism and Buddhism to perpetuate transmigration and in its ethical consequences to determine the nature of the person's next existence. Hinduism & Buddhism The total effect of a person's actions and conduct during the successive phases of the person's existence, regarded as determining the person's destiny

Hmmm.... lets ponder on that for a moment. So does that mean if you are a mean hateful bitter person in this life... you will get it in the next?

I don't know about you but I'm not really worried about the "next" life since I'm going to Heaven anyway ;)

So... even though I don't want to be known to quote anything Buddhist... I thought I would share. What I get from reading on the internet is that BAD KARMA is your OWN PERSONAL BITTERNESS. So regardless if you rejoice in someone's pain or not, your just filled with bad karma all the way around in your own unhappiness. That must really be terribile to be so miserable that you find joy in other peoples pain. 

I will admit that I have done some bad things in my life... and I will and have paid for it. But as far as I understand and what I have read on how KARMA works... if you wish bad KARMA on a person, it will then turn back to you ten times fold. That's a reason for us to want to wait for her to strike? Hmmm.... interesting how that works. 

God says that you shouldn't rejoice in someone's pain or his anger will be turned from them and towards you.

The word of GOD says: Proverbs 24:17 - Don’t rejoice when your enemies fall; don’t be happy when they stumble.

In context: (this is my favorite part)

 ¹⁶ The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again.
      But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked.
 ¹⁷ Don’t rejoice when your enemies fall;
      don’t be happy when they stumble.
 ¹⁸ For the Lord will be displeased with you
      and will turn his anger away from them.

My God says... (read it again verse 18) For the LORD will be displeased with YOU and will turn his anger away from them. Sounds a little like the law of KARMA doesn't it. If you rejoice when your enemy falls, it's going to come back on you.

So for you that have "rejoiced" in my current trials I have one for you... One day... you are going to regret the fact that you had fun with the dark times in my life. But just remember this... it's my life, not yours. My decisions, my problems. You are the one that chose not to be a part of it by your actions. Or did you forget that...

Matthew 23:12 says - But those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.

Matthew 15:11 says - It’s not what goes into your mouth that defiles you; you are defiled by the words that come out of your mouth.”

and finally...

Matthew 7:3-5 reads “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.


Just so you know... I don't believe in Karma. I believe in Gods word. MY God says that I have been forgiven... that, my friend, is all that matters in my life.

The Wednesday Funnies

Yes... Rosie is back. I have a few things that I need to get off my chest and I will do so later today but for now, enjoy the Wednesday Funnies. Happy Wednesday Y'all!

    Cowboy:  "That your dog?"

    Indian:  "Yep."

    Cowboy:  "Mind if I speak to him?"

    Indian:  "Dog no talk."

    Cowboy:  "Hey dog, how's it going?"

    Dog:  "Doin' all right."

    Indian: (Look of shock!)

    Cowboy:  "Is this Indian your owner?" (Pointing at the Indian...)

    Dog:  "Yep."

    Cowboy:  "How's he treating you?"

    Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and  takes
    me to the lake once a week to play."

    Indian: (Look of total disbelief)

   Cowboy:  "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

    Indian:  "Horse no talk."

    Cowboy:  "Hey horse, how's it going?"

    Horse: "Cool."

    Indian: (Extreme look of shock!)

    Cowboy:  "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the Indian...)

    Horse:  "Yep."

   Cowboy:  "How's he treating you?"

    Horse:  "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he rides me, brushes me down
    often and keeps me in a lean-to to protect me from the weather."

    Indian: (Look of total amazement)

   Cowboy:  "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

    Indian:  "Sheep lie."

writers block

It's not that I haven't wanted to write...

I just don't know what to write about...

lately everything I have written has been so depressing and down that I don't want to bother anyone with any of that stuff for a while. AND I didn't even do my Wednesday Funnies this past week. I don't know what the deal is but maybe I can get over it soon.

Maybe I just get tired of the stalkers and the people that are so freakin' nosey and have no business reading my blog checking it out all the time? I don't know.

I do know that I will be taking a short vacay... until I can figure out what to write again. So until then... peace love and chicken grease... much love to y'all.

The Help

Ok folks, I saw the movie, I read the book... and now... I tell you... DO THE SAME!

I promise it had to be one of the best books I have read in a long time. I literally finished it in 3 days. I couldn't put it down. I went to see the movie when it came out and they follow right along. There are a few things that were changed, but for the most part... the movie does the book justice.

You will never look at chocolate pie again in the same way. I doubt very seriously I will ever eat it again.

As far as the movie goes... I went with my friend Kristi. This is totally a chick flick, but honestly I don't know any man that wouldn't secretly like it. I'm sure they would never admit it. I am definitely a day late and a dollar short telling you about the movie, but I finished my book.

Do you realized how hard it is to read a book with kids? #1 and #2 really are not interested in me having any time to myself to read much less take a bath or talk on the phone. Their daddy... well that's another story for another day, but me... nooooo. Forget it. Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, Mom, Mom, Mom, MOMMY!!!! I know, it only gets worse.

go get the book... read it... love it... see the movie.

Peace out yo!

In 1960s Mississippi, Southern society girl Skeeter returns from college with dreams of being a writer. She turns her small town on its ear by choosing to interview the black women who have spent their lives taking care of prominent white families. Only Aibileen, the housekeeper of Skeeter's best friend, will talk at first. But as the pair continue the collaboration, more women decide to come forward, and as it turns out, they have quite a lot to say.

Happy Friday...

I am horrible at making decisions. Go left? Go right? I don't know sometimes. What do I want to do? In all my OCD'ness that is one thing I really can't handle. Just like buying that new car. I couldn't decide on what I wanted so the hubs just bought something. Glad he got something I like.

I always for some reason thought that the Magic 8 ball could sometime help me in the decision making process. I know that it is completely random, so maybe that is why I never bought one. I know I asked for one as a kid, just never got it.

Look to the right on your screen... there it is... ask it a question. I have.

The Wednesday Funnies

Thank you to my friend Angel for passing this one over. Sorry I am running late today.





The sensitive man

A woman meets a man in a bar.

They talk; they connect; they end Up leaving together.

They get back to his place,

And as he shows her around his Apartment.

She notices that one wall of his Bedroom is Completely filled with soft, sweet, Cuddly teddy bears.

There are three shelves in the Bedroom,

With hundreds and hundreds of cute, Cuddly teddy bears carefully placed In rows, covering the entire wall!

It was obvious that he had taken Quite some time to lovingly arrange them

And she was immediately touched By the amount of thought he had Put into organizing the display.

There were small bears all along The bottom shelf,

Medium-sized bears covering the Length of the middle shelf,

And huge, enormous bears running All the way along the top shelf.

She found it strange for an Obviously masculine guy To have such a large collection of
Teddy Bears,

She is quite impressed by his Sensitive side.

But doesn't mention this to him.

They share a bottle of wine and Continue talking and, After awhile, she finds herself Thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy Could be the one!

Maybe he could be the future Father of my children?'

She turns to him and kisses him Lightly on the lips

He responds warmly. They continue to kiss, the passion Builds, And he romantically lifts her in His arms and carries her into his bedroom

Where they rip off each other's Clothes and make hot, steamy love.

She is so overwhelmed that she Responds with more passion, More creativity, more heat than she Has ever known.

After an intense, explosive night Of raw passion with this sensitive guy,

They are lying there together in The afterglow.

The woman rolls over, gently Strokes his chest and asks coyly,

'Well,how was it?'

The guy gently smiles at her,

Strokes her cheek,

Looks deeply into her eyes,

And says........




'Help yourself to any prize From the middle shelf'

Wake up...

It has been on my mind and sometimes I wonder why I have to deal with my sickness. Its really not fair. I have no wounds that show, no broken bones, no open woundseven though it feels like it sometimes. You can't see what hurts, I can't point to a spot and say.... that's it. I can't be diagnosed with a MRI or a mammogram. It's just there... inside my head like a cancer.

I'm severely depressed... and I have been diagnosed because I recognized the signs. Some people don't.

I know I've talked about it before, but yesterday... it scared me. I have a friend right now that has had a hard time dealing with his depression. I'm not sure what has happened, but right now his mind is in another world. I hate that for him and his family. I know how he feels. I know how it feels to hurt so freaking bad and no one understands why. I made a post a couple days ago saying that I was going to make it a point to be happy, but I haven't been that successful. It makes me happy to blog and get everything out so if you are tired of reading it, sorry... deal or don't.

I know a lot of people have a hard time dealing with or trying to understand depression and bi-polar disorder. Both are a horrible disease that really can not be cured no matter how hard you try. You can be medicated, but it takes years to find the right mix or cocktail of drugs to make a person feel half way normal, and by that I mean somewhat comfortable in our own skin. We never feel normal. There are days that I feel like I could crawl out of my skin, seriously. Everything hurts and if I could just get out of this body maybe I could feel better. So with that I get anxiety attacks. Sometimes at night I get RLS from it too. So maybe if I stretch my legs out a little further I could go to sleep, but I get so stressed out from it that I cry myself to sleep.

People with depression, real depression, won't tell you either. We are not proud of it, but we need someone to talk to about it now and then. Sometimes the Dr. will just shuffle us in like cattle, write a new script and send us on our way. Mine will at least spend 15 minutes with me to see how I am. All good? Good deal.... here is your supply see you in two months. Sometimes that pill can be hard to swallow, but he means well and at the moment.... I can deal with life in general.

My husband does not understand it at all. He doesn't realize that sometimes he can say just the right thing to send me over the edge... right now I'm on the edge and he keeps pushing me a little at a time. That's ok, we always bounce back. I guess it is pretty obvious I'm in my low cycle right now... have been for about a month or so. When I'm like that I don't find very many things amusing. I can't keep track of the humor that goes on around the house. It's almost like I'm a zombie. I wish I could just snap out of it

You would be amazed at the number of people that go undiagnosed every year. I have friends that I see the sure signs of depression, but they don't do anything. They think they can "deal" with feeling blue.... for months at a time, for no reason why... go get some help please? Thank you.

So for me the day goes on. I keep pressing on. There isn't much I can do about it. People pray for me and I think it helps, but it is a sickness and one day... one day... I hope I can get past it.

Psalm 88

    

 ¹ LORD, you are the God who saves me;
   day and night I cry out to you.
² May my prayer come before you;
   turn your ear to my cry.

 ³ I am overwhelmed with troubles
   and my life draws near to death.
⁴ I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
   I am like one without strength.
⁵ I am set apart with the dead,
   like the slain who lie in the grave,
whom you remember no more,
   who are cut off from your care.

 ⁶ You have put me in the lowest pit,
   in the darkest depths.
⁷ Your wrath lies heavily on me;
   you have overwhelmed me with all your waves.^[d]
8 You have taken from me my closest friends
   and have made me repulsive to them.
I am confined and cannot escape;
 ⁹ my eyes are dim with grief.

   I call to you, LORD, every day;
   I spread out my hands to you.
¹⁰ Do you show your wonders to the dead?
   Do their spirits rise up and praise you?
¹¹ Is your love declared in the grave,
   your faithfulness in Destruction^[e]?
¹² Are your wonders known in the place of darkness,
   or your righteous deeds in the land of oblivion?

 ¹³ But I cry to you for help, LORD;
   in the morning my prayer comes before you.
¹⁴ Why, LORD, do you reject me
   and hide your face from me?

 ¹⁵ From my youth I have suffered and been close to death;
   I have borne your terrors and am in despair.
¹⁶ Your wrath has swept over me;
   your terrors have destroyed me.
¹⁷ All day long they surround me like a flood;
   they have completely engulfed me.
¹⁸ You have taken from me friend and neighbor—
   darkness is my closest friend.

.

To Sushi or not to Sushi...

There is a new little sushi place in town that I just LOVE!

I say if you have never tried it... now is the time. I know that it may seem like a new fad around here (Hicksville) but I really like it. Sofar I have only tried the following: soft shell crab, tuna, shrimp tempura, salmon roll, and california roll. I would be interestested to know what all you have tried in the past and what you suggest that I should test out.

Hello Stalker....

Could you please comment below and let me know exactly what you are looking for? I see your IP address pop up SEVERAL times but I would like to know what you want... because I can't seem to figure it out. You are obviously trying to block me and then checking out several of my blog post at a time. Which I think is funny in the first place.

Block options?

search and archive? Really?

Why don't you just email me and ask me where to find it and I will direct you to the blog post you are looking for. Mmmmm.... K? I have nothing to hide. Nothing.... unlike you.

The Wednesday Funnies

while surfing around on the interwebs (stumbleupon.com) I found this and I thought it was funny. Copy and pasted so please excuse the fact that the font in all caps. I know... it's killing my OCD, but I was too lazy to try and fix it.

ACTUAL HEADLINES...

POLICE BEGIN CAMPAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERS

SAFETY EXPERTS SAY SCHOOL BUS PASSENGERS SHOULD BE BELTED

DRUNK GETS NINE MONTHS IN VIOLIN CASE

SURVIVOR OF SIAMESE TWINS JOINS PARENTS

FARMER BILL DIES IN HOUSE

IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS

PROSTITUTES APPEAL TO POPE

BRITISH LEFT WAFFLES ON FALKLAND ISLANDS

EYE DROPS OFF SHELF

TEACHER STRIKES IDLE KIDS

SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM

ENRAGED COW INJURES FARMER WITH AX

PLANE TOO CLOSE TO GROUND, CRASH PROBE TOLD

MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH

JUVENILE COURT TO TRY SHOOTING DEFENDANT

STOLEN PAINTING FOUND BY TREE

TWO SOVIET SHIPS COLLIDE, ONE DIES

2 SISTERS REUNITED AFTER 18 YEARS IN CHECKOUT COUNTER

KILLER SENTENCED TO DIE FOR SECOND TIME IN 10 YEARS

DRUNKEN DRIVERS PAID $1000 IN '84

WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE

IF STRIKE ISN'T SETTLED QUICKLY, IT MAY LAST A WHILE

COLD WAVE LINKED TO TEMPERATURES

ENFIELD COUPLE SLAIN; POLICE SUSPECT HOMICIDE

SIGNS…

AT A SANTA FE GAS STATION: WE WILL SELL GASOLINE TO ANYONE IN A GLASS CONTAINER.

ON THE WALL OF A BALTIMORE ESTATE: TRESPASSERS WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE FULL EXTENT OF THE LAW. --SISTERS OF MERCY

ON A LONG-ESTABLISHED NEW MEXICO DRY CLEANERS:38 YEARS ON THE SAME SPOT.

IN A LOS ANGELES DANCE HALL: GOOD CLEAN DANCING EVERY NIGHT BUT SUNDAY.

ON A MOVIE THEATER: CHILDREN'S MATINEE TODAY. ADULTS NOT ADMITTED UNLESS WITH CHILD.

IN A FLORIDA MATERNITY WARD: NO CHILDREN ALLOWED.

IN THE OFFICES OF A LOAN COMPANY: ASK ABOUT OUR PLANS FOR OWNING YOUR HOME.

IN A NEW YORK MEDICAL BUILDING: MENTAL HEALTH PREVENTION CENTER

IN A TOY DEPARTMENT:FIVE SANTA CLAUSES -- NO WAITING!

ON A NEW YORK CONVALESCENT HOME: FOR THE SICK AND TIRED OF THE EPISCOPAL CHURCH.

AT A NUMBER OF MILITARY BASES: RESTRICTED TO UNAUTHORIZED PERSONNEL.

ON A DISPLAY OF "I LOVE YOU ONLY" VALENTINE CARDS: NOW AVAILABLE IN MULTI-PACKS.

ON A SHOPPING MALL MARQUEE: ARCHERY TOURNAMENT -- EARS PIERCED

OUTSIDE A COUNTRY SHOP: WE BUY JUNK AND SELL ANTIQUES.

IN THE WINDOW OF AN OREGON STORE: WHY GO ELSEWHERE AND BE CHEATED WHEN YOU CAN COME HERE?

IN A MAINE RESTAURANT: OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

IN A NEW JERSEY RESTAURANT: OPEN 11 AM TO 11 PM MIDNIGHT.

IN THE VESTRY OF A NEW ENGLAND CHURCH: WILL THE LAST PERSON TO LEAVE PLEASE SEE

THAT THE PERPETUAL LIGHT IS EXTINGUISHED.

IN A PENNSYLVANIA CEMETERY: PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

ON THE GROUNDS OF A PUBLIC SCHOOL: NO TRESSPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.

IN A LIBRARY: BLOTTER PAPER WILL NO LONGER BE AVAILABLE UNTIL THE PUBLIC STOPS TAKING IT AWAY.

SIMILARLY, IN FRONT OF A NEW HAMPSHIRE CAR WASH: IF YOU CAN'T READ THIS, IT'S TIME TO WASH YOUR CAR.

AND APPARENTLY, SOMEWHERE IN ENGLAND IN AN OPEN FIELD OTHERWISE UNTOUCHED BY HUMAN PRESENCE, THERE IS A SIGN THAT SAYS "DO NOT THROW STONES AT THIS SIGN."